Zoos may seem all casual and whatnot but all the industry zoo’ers know it’s a fierce and competitive battlefield. A few months back a local zoo made it’s spotlight in the news (and the Hecrenews no less, the world’s (and worlds beyond!!!) most reliable newsource, covering everying in the Hecresphere) by adding homo sapiens to ‘take care of’ but insiders say it’s just to draw more customers in. However, disaster struck a one local zoo who claims to have just the thing needed to make them stand out from the rest.

Local zookeeper, Vladislav Mauricette, who works at the local zoo (but not the one Deep Shunsuke manages) was in charge of making sure the new exhibit was ready. Many on lookers saw huge curtains in the reptilian area of the zoo and their curiosity peaked, a few mischevious devils tried getting into the exhibit but were “polietly” kicked out. Passerby James “Big Killah” is here to tell us all about it (in his own opinion of course). “I be walking down the zoo, then I come here and see something new! There’s something sus going on here with all the big curtains, I’m counting the people here and it’s more than 10! I’m the hippest rapper on the street, the coolest guy you can meet. But I tell you, I tell you man, this new exhibit’s grabbing everyone’s attention like a box of raisan bran!” We discontinued the interview as he starting rhyming off-topic. So this new exhibit was no small addition, it was definetely something huge, but what was it? Read the title or the next paragarph to find out, we are going to ask the man himself, Mauricette.

“Luckily the boss isn’t too mad, the culprit is someone big, someone with big plans, and they are making the ting go quack from way back,” says Mauricette. “So what exactly was it behind those curtains?” I asked. “You won’t believe it, even I didn’t believe, it was great, it was legendary, it was exquisite. We got our hands on a T-Rex. Those are rare enough, and we had a pink T-Rex. Do you know how rare that is?!” “Um…I didn’t do my research this time and had no clue this existed, so I’ll go with no.” “Well, just try and picture it. I’m pretty sure you can picture a T-Rex, now just make it pink instead of green.” “Wait they were green, I was certain they were #34f9e2!” “What the…anyways, we lost it. I don’t know what happened. Obviously it didn’t escape, the traces left weren’t like that and we wouldn’t have let it escape.”

Afterwards, the local zoo contacted the best in the business, the Phone Search and Rescue Squad (PS). If you do not know who they are I suggest you catch up on that saga here. The PS immediately deployed their forces, they thought a T-Rex would be easy to find, it’s quite hard to find, but the culprit they are dealing with is quite experienced, and PS isn’t going easy on them. The PS has a minor lead, but it is not a very strong one, we do not doubt the PS will be able to track down the T-Rex, but retrieving it will be something they have never done before.

Mauricette is worried about the zoo’s reputation. If the Pink T-Rex isn’t procured within a week, the zoo will lose street cred., and they may have to go out of business, possibly one of the worst things for a zoo. Of course this article isn’t long enough so we need to think of clever reasons to pad the length so it’s HAC approved (Hecrenews Article Quality Control). The remaining question to ask, why were they keeping it there?

“Of course most people think it’s to show off, especially people who claim to be in the business. While yes, we are going to be showing off our Pink T-rex, that is not the main reason we are taking it in. We take pride in providing aid to animals. If you look at our exhibits, you’ll notice that we only have endangered species. Here we can increase the species’ population numbers and start releasing them back into the wild, their real homes (the ones which aren’t filled with man-made structures, of course). While our industrial growth may have been good for technology, it has really been bad for the environment and these animals. Look at these poor animals, they never learned to throw stuff and we humans never got nerfed and broke the evolution system. Of course, we aren’t doing much to help. If I want the readers to do something about this, it would be take action against deforestation and begin forestation be dehousetation. We can destroy homes, get some cement, steel, other useful resources, and build more compact apartments or homes. Instead of building homes on the environment, we should have the environment be our home and have smaller shelters. But of course this is a radical idea and I don’t want another calamity going on, but it’s just an idea to think about.” “That is quite radical, luckilly our boss doesn’t care as long as we pump out articles.”

I sure do hope they find that Pink T-Rex, looking forward to seeing it live. This has been Mister Mjir, popping in and now popping out.