So after getting exclusive access to the world’s first time traveling appartus, Bulstrode decided to take me back in time to restore my streak. We were only in the machine for about a second and I was ready to step out and restore the honor of the legendary streak.

The automatic doors of the appartus slowly opened and the fog machine Bulstrode added for dramatic effect began to whirr, and it was quite the suspense. For the first time ever, I have time traveled. However, disaster struck as I read the date on the large clock. It was September 19th! Almost two weeks had passed since I first went in, and it all took place within a second. “You promise this machine isn’t just changing the time of that clock?” “I mean, it sorta is because time travel will move that clock forward.” I checked my own cellphone, which Bulstrode never even took notice of, and time had truly passed.

“Ah!” exclaimed Bulstrode, “Simply a systematic error. I forgot to calibrate it!” “Bruh,” I said, “That was legit scary.” “Okay get back in, let’s go to September 2nd, the date the streak was lost.” “I have one question?” “What?” “If we re-write history, will the previous articles get updated?” “First of all, that kind of thinking only leads to paradoxes and we ain’t gonna deal with them. Second, after studying hard in school I have gained immense wisdom. I predict the website will be too lazy to update itself, even if time itself was being re-written, the people behind the scenes at the Hecrenews must be big-shots.” “Well our boss sure isn’t.” And so we went back into the machine, ready to go back to September 2nd. This has been Mister Mjir, popp-